Malaysia England Spain China Germany Italy New Zealand Indonesia

archives by entry title

24 November 2004

Pissed On

Location : Cherating, Malaysia.

You have to read this entry. But first, the waves in Cherating are getting small so I'm heading up to Kuala Terengganu tonight to try chasing those waves again. Gosh, I love my life!!!

This year, the surf break in Cherating is suffering from a serious jellyfish problem. There are normally no jellyfishes around during the surf season so I don't know what is wrong this time around. These bastards refuse to go away and they are still trying to zap us into oblivion. Did the jellyfishes decide to go on a breeding spree? Haven't they heard of contraception? Almost every surfer who has surfed Cherating this year was stung by a jellyfish, some a few times. Then again, sometimes the waves are breaking so beautifully that it's hard to resist the temptation so we risk it and go surfing anyway. I've been stung twice at separate times but some of these guys got stung up to 6 times in one surfing session. However, everytime I am out in the water, I am extra wary and very cautious. The slightest thing that touches my skin makes me jump just like how I used to when I was a virgin being touched by a girl. Haha....ok, NOT true.

Just the other day, I was walking along the beach with Kelly my surfboard and I came across a young lad who was crouching like a tiger grabbing the swollen parts of his body. This poor fellow was stung all over the front, back and hands. He was hurting, grimacing in pain, crouched on the sand shivering, feeling faint and nausceous. Jellyfish casualties can be pretty traumatic for first timers who have never been stung. So what did I do to help? I pissed on him. As in excreting urine and pouring it on him. Urine is an antidote. Coincidently, I came out of the water to go for a wee wee so the timing couldn't have been better! But of course, I checked with the dude before I showered him with some tender loving care. I didn't just whip out my Magnum(ahem...) and fire away! I've tried drowning cockroaches before but never a human being so I was feeling quite weird. However, the lad sorta asked me to do it which made me feel a little better because a man has to be in a LOT of pain to ask someone to pee on him. Just after I poured my urine all over him, his worried Dad came running along and before I could warn him, picked the lad right up into his arms to carry him to a waiting vehicle about 100 yards away. Up till now, I still don't know if I did the right thing by not having said a word. Anyway, his small-sized Dad looked like he was having a hard time lifting the dude. So as much as I hate to wallow in my own urine, I....offered to carry him instead. Trust me, those words were pretty hard to come out of my mouth at that time. Smelled my own urine, I did. And picture this - while carrying the dude, I had to huff and puff all the way to the vehicle although I tried hard holding my breath. As disgusting as the whole episode may have been, I think it was a good thing. Something I normally flush down the toilet bowl(or water the plants) was put to good use that day. I recycled waste. =) The lad is back in Cherating after being admitted to hospital for one night. He told me he was given 8 jabs including steroids. And now he is having a hard time being hassled by the locals who are teasing him. Poor dude.

Two days before this incident, a mate of mine got stung all over his left leg. I hadn't seen him in a while and I didn't notice him limping towards me so I expected the usual ruckus when you haven't seen a mate in a long time. Instead of a "Hello", the first thing he said to me was "Could you please piss on me?". Times have changed, haven't they? I was out-of-stock then so I couldn't help him. Damn, I gotta start selling my urine if this happens again! So if any of you get stung by a jellyfish and you need a cuppa wholesome goodness, you know who to call. Yours truly, at your service!

Posted by Ripcord at November 24, 2004 07:05 PM

Comments

Funny story... great pictures of waves... none of you pissing of people? hahaha.. pity that... be catching up with you real soon (fngers crossed)... :)

Posted by: Sammy Davies Jnr at November 25, 2004 08:33 AM

hahahahahha... wow
another community service hah??

but amazingly u can "do it" in such a "tense" environment...

however, i believe tht lad is very grateful to you....

do u need a marketing guy for that NOMADWATER??

kakakkakakkakaka

Posted by: zbjernak at November 25, 2004 09:18 AM

LMFAO. Oh yeah. That was grand lol. I didn't really think that worked. My brother went to Florida and right away got stung. He told me he pissed on his finger, but until this day I haven't belived that that's what you really do. Do now though, lmao. I'm so weary to about ANYTHING touching me. When we were out in Cali, I would freak out if like..my cousin even touched me. I'm petrified man. But, you just can't resist the ocean. Haha.

Posted by: Cassie at November 25, 2004 12:49 PM

the silly young fart is now lauging her ass off -*wink wink*-...

... and feeling a lot better from her latest bout of insomnia and flu and fever and everything mucus-ey :) ripcord could double up as a phoney doctor, perhaps? -*grin*-

love, jin

Posted by: erinnys at November 25, 2004 03:58 PM

sammy : see u soon if you make it here!

zbjernak : nomadwater is in the making...you wanna invest?

cassie : if your brother needs someone to piss on him, u know who to call....ghostbusters.

erinnys : huh? it was a guy. lad = guy. lass = girl.

Posted by: Ripcord at November 25, 2004 11:32 PM

the pee-ing edwin.... viola...!

Posted by: kevin chin at November 26, 2004 05:05 AM

ripcord: what's with the lad/lass thingy? -*confused*-

Posted by: erinnys at November 26, 2004 10:04 AM

ripcord: my first expression when we do meet up again won't be 'please piss on me'. i promise :)

Posted by: erinnys at November 26, 2004 10:06 AM

so, who do you call when you need to be pissed on? do you get some girl to squat over you and thoroughly wet you...?

if this persists, soon you can start a 'golden shower' spin off site - 'ed, the peeing surfer'.

Posted by: grim at November 26, 2004 04:37 PM

a "travel" website has become an adult fetish site....
OMG.....

Posted by: zbjernak at November 27, 2004 12:52 AM

omg, that`s so funny! you pissed on him?! i`ve heard that it will help as well...but i could never piss on someone...no, never! ;) awww, i love the word jellyfish - sounds so cute, don`t you think?!

Posted by: Mel at November 27, 2004 01:45 AM

hey bro when are u coming bac? do u attending AUN wedding dinner? if yes after that are u interested a trip to thailand? how abt phuket? pls email me or call me ya thank...

Posted by: joeteoh at November 27, 2004 03:04 PM

grim : i'd rather hold out the pain than have someone piss on me! or maybe i'll wait at some car tyre and wait for a dog to come along...

zbjernak : adult fetish? i think the website is still as per normal. it's just my friends who have weird fetishes...heh heh...

mel : not even if the person BEGS you to piss on him/her?

joe teoh : yes, i'll be there!

Posted by: Ripcord at November 28, 2004 10:08 PM

Youre such a sweetheart... pissing on everyone. To help with the pain of course;)

Ohhh and thanks for the comment you left me I understand better about the megapixels and don't worry I won't call you a nerd lol...

Posted by: Aurora at November 29, 2004 07:58 AM

ripcord: are u gonna be there for Xmas?

i'm planning a gathering but the agenda isn't known yet. a get away with me entourage at east coast sounds cool. any advice?

love, jin

Posted by: erinnys at November 29, 2004 12:54 PM

yeah, tell me about it. i've known them for more than a year now and all those wannabemaroon5-lovers just heard of them..it's so friggin' annoying! i especially hate it when people ask me if i've ever heard maroon 5's newest song, and then they'll be like "probably not, it's too new" OMG just shut the fuck up XD sorry 'bout that. i get frustrated about the fact that maroon 5 is not 'my' band anymore. <3

Posted by: Frederique at November 30, 2004 01:48 AM

OMG I hate how you're writing about surfing and hot weather when it's freezing here :(

Posted by: Kelina at December 1, 2004 10:28 AM

aurora : thanks babe! if you ever need anything like that, you know who to call... =)

erinnys : it's highly likely because there doesn't seem to be a time when there will be no waves. another storm is brewing in the philippines so that means more waves to come...

kelina : maybe you're in the wrong country...?

Posted by: Ripcord at December 1, 2004 09:44 PM