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28 December 2003

Disappointment

Location : Picton, New Zealand.

In the summer of 2001, I graduated from the University of Central Lancashire. After that, I spent the rest of the summer surfing, camping and working in Croyde, North Devon, England. I was working in an English country restaurant managed by Caroline who signed my guestbook at No.20. Anyway, on a Wednesday, a big swell hit the coast for just one day and for my 'amateur' standards, it was huge. It took me and another South African dude half an hour standing on the beach just thinking if we should paddle in at all. I have never ever not made it out to the back of the wave before(the point where the wave breaks) so I decided to paddle out because if I didn't, then I wouldn't know if I could make it or not. After a full 25 minutes of non-stop paddling and duck diving, I saw this huge mother of a wave looking as if it was going to break ON me. So I did what any other normal person would do. I pissed in my wetsuit. This thick 9 foot swell picked me up until my surfboard went vertical. I had to push it down to the back of the wave and still it sucked me backwards, into the plethora of liquid turbulence and I swallowed a few gallons of yummy sea water. That was the point where I thought to myself that I have had enough of my balls being in my throat and that it just wasn't my day to surf. So, I turned my board around and rode the whitewash(which was almost as tall as me) back to the beach. I remembered that day because it was a day I failed.

Yesterday, I woke up at 7am in the morning after a late night, rushed to the docks to take a boat to the Bay of Many Coves in the Marlborough Sounds. Andrea, Des, Ryan and me were going to do a 5 hour "walk" which is part of the famous Queen Charlotte track along a sound by the same name. So what about it? Its just a walk, right? Fucken bollocks. The first 2 hour part of the track was literally very steep and uphill all the way. I huffed and puffed going uphill the first 20 minutes and I kept wondering when was the track going to start levelling out again. But no, it just kept going up and up, on and on. For the next 10 minutes, I contemplated giving up because I felt my legs falling apart, I was getting dizzy and I couldn't inhale the full capacity of my lungs(and I don't even have asthma!). As hard as I tried and as hard as I cried, I couldn't make it up anymore. Ryan was really whipping me verbally and I really didn't want to remember another failure in my life but I felt like passing out anytime and if I did pass out along the track, it would be harder to get me out so....I gave up. It shook me up quite a bit because I realised now that I need a regular cardiovascular workout instead of just depending on surfing every now and then(which just works my upper body). Ever since that, I've been a bit of a laughing stock and I've been given names - wimp, sad cunt, wuss, etc. but I saw that coming. I even thought about that before giving up!

Damn, I'm so sad now I'm going out for a smoke.

Posted by Ripcord at December 28, 2003 07:09 PM

Comments

Mmmmm...
Don't have asthma, but do smoke???
And still wonder why you can't go for more than a few minutes up a little hill?
(wuss)!

Posted by: The Raphrider at December 28, 2003 09:17 PM